Cuddly Bear

Micah is becoming a little more cuddly recently, and I like it:) I think I have always noticed how much he likes to nuzzle, but I think it has been even more noticeable lately, especially since we were just at a weekend-long tournament for volleyball and so I was holding him a lot.
He definitely like to be sitting out watching everything that is going on while he is awake, but once he gets tired, this whole routine sets in. He gets himself sitting sideways on my lap, and starts to bury his face in my chest, or sometimes even back as far as my armpit! He loves it! Loves to have his face buried in something. He'll keep nuzzling like this for a while, and I can feel his body going limp throughout the process. Then, eventually, he gives up completely, his eyes close and he is sound asleep. At this point, he can sleep through just about any noise, as long as the noise is consistent. It can be consistently loud or consistently soft, as long as it stays about the same. It is kind of cute, though, that he seems to startle easily, like with the clapping and cheering at the end of a good point in a volleyball match. But then he normally goes right back to sleep, cuddled up in my arms.
I love my cuddly bear!!

Being a Mommy

I didn't always want to have kids. At least the actual "have" part. Fear of the labor, the pain, the needles, the weight gain, the side effects. I thought adoption might be an option.

But as I thought about how short the pregnancy all the way through labor would be compared with the amount of time spent with the child, it made having kids seem not so bad after all. Even if I had 24 hours of grueling labor cooped up in a crappy hospital, could that compare to the sheer joy of bringing a life into this world? Could that compare with the first smiles and first steps and first words, and all the other firsts I have yet to even experience?? I think not! (And I ended up really enjoying most of my pregnancy, too!)

So, even in coming to terms with knowing that I definitely wanted to have kids and wanted to have them, I don't think I had any concept of how much I would truly enjoy being a mother! I knew I wanted to be one, I knew I would enjoy it, I knew it would change me for the better, I knew I would love my children, but the kind of love I have learned to feel for my child I cannot even begin to express into words. It is almost unbelievable to me how much love I feel for my son!

He recognizes me and smiles at me, and he really likes that I feed him!! But that's about it. He can't tell me that he loves me yet, he can't come running to me to cry on my shoulder when something bad happens yet, and I don't think he even has any idea of what love is. It's like how we are with God before we truly know Him, before we have a relationship with Him. We know who He is and maybe even know that He is good, and we know we want to know him when we need something, and yet, even in our naivety, He loves us SO much, even though He will get nothing in return!! This is a new understanding of this concept for me. Not something I haven't ever thought about before, but a new understanding of it because of Micah. God has given me a love greater than I have ever known before for a little being in my life that doesn't even know how to love back yet. God has given me the ability to love without wanting anything in return for this love I can show. God is love and He is showing me, through Micah, how to love like He loves!

Being a mommy is great! I love every moment of it (good or bad, all of it seems good because God has given me this gift and I want to cherish it all!). But learning to be more like Christ through being a mommy is even better! God is cool!

Sleeping Positions

Micah has always been and will always be adorable! But he is even more so lately, as he has been falling asleep in some really cute positions. He seems like he is trying to be a little more independent as he is falling asleep. He will sit next to someone on the couch and nuzzle for a bit, and then all of a sudden he is sleeping...Here are some examples of his cuteness!!

Angry and Cute

Just recently Micah is starting to show a bit more anger. He is normally pretty chill, but his angry cry is starting to get louder and more fierce and harder for us to console him in these times. The things that normally work don't seem to when he gets like this...
So today this happened and Matt was trying to help, but nothing was working. And as much as Micah seems to enjoy being touched and held and included in on any personal contact, Matt decided to let him sit by himself. Yes, sit. By himself. He propped him in some blankets on the couch to give him a cushy base, and Micah stayed there for maybe 30 seconds before he started to tilt to the side. He eventually landed resting on my coat, sucked on it for a minute or two, and was soundly sleeping within about 3 minutes! No fussing, no crying, no nothing except sitting all by himself and then falling asleep in this cute position...

sleepless...and pitiful...

I will get back to the Pa trip, but for now...
I have been utterly amazed at how well micah goes to bed every night. seriously...i feed him, change him, swaddle him, put him in his bassinet, and even if he was a little fussy as any of that was going on, it's like he definitely knows when it is time for bed and he gets quiet and falls asleep...
but not tonight...
i don't know if it is because his feeding schedule is a little off since the past couple of days he has been eating about every 4 hours instead of 3, so i fed him tonight at 9 (it had been 5 hours) instead of around 10 or 11? does he know it is earlier than usual? i wasn't quite tired, so i just brought my computer up, turned the lights out and decided it was dark enough...but does he know i am not sleeping? he loves to be around people and just can't stand it that i am awake and he is not??
but it is not even a real cry, it is so pitiful. And every once in a while it stops completely, and, then suddenly, out of nowhere, he remembers that he was supposed to be sad and he starts fake wailing again...and then he stops for a while, but has the sniffles, just to let me know that he is still upset, in case i was wondering or felt bad for him...
i think i have spoiled him. i think he likes human contact a lot. and i do too, i love holding him. mmmmm, uh oh. i've created a monster!! haha, no, but i have created a little man who is very aware of what is going on around him and very aware of how he can get what he wants: human contact.

First Big Road Trip

We just got back from our first big road trip to PA! Took 6 1/2 hours to get there, but we made it back in 5! Making improvements quickly:) I'll definitely post more soon, but I am just sitting here watching my son sleep so soundly after being so busy for the past few days...he was a great sport, though! Seriously, what a great kid we have:)

Another First

Gonna be full of firsts for a long time...
Tonight was the first time that he laughed! I had changed a nice big poopy diaper, so he was definitely feeling good, and I still had him on the changing table when I used my finger nails over his belly, chest and neck. He was giving some good big smiles, and then a couple of little laughs, or at least as close as he is to laughing at this point.
So not only is this when he is just realizing that when we are tickling him, it actually tickles, but he is finding his laugh:) I can't wait for the big belly laugh!!!

Rough Day, Good Night

Micah had a rough day yesterday...wanted to be held A LOT. I think a part of it is that he had been sick for a couple of days, so we were holding him more, but now I think it is more stemming from that...so I have to start all over again with letting him cry it out...today seems to be better thus far!! yay!
But, I was so worried last night because I was afraid he wouldn't go to sleep without being held...but nope. He is amazing! He slept over 7 hours, going about 8 hours between feedings, and that was amazing! What a great kid! I love him!!!

Falling Asleep

Micah makes me laugh...
I put him down to watch his favorite toy, his singing, blinky star...he was upset at first, but eventually decided that I was going to leave him there, so he might as well try to enjoy it without crying...


The music on his star stopped, and as I looked over to see if he was going to remain content or if he was going to want me to play it again, I quickly realized he was OK...he was sound asleep...

Micah's First Snow

I know Micah will have many firsts...some he will remember and some he won't...
I know he won't remember this one...his first snow!! I think i was in my first year of college the last time it really snowed...right after spring break my freshman year...so....10 years ago!!! Holy Cow!! a Decade for real?!
So, I had to get a picture since Micah won't remember it and it may not happen again until he is 10! HAHA